Thursday, August 12, 2021

52 Ancestors 2021: Week 20: Cousin Bait

As per Amy Johnson Crow, "cousin bait" is a term used to describe the ways we try to attract the attention of others researching our family. Quite literally, "bait to lure in cousins." So the topic for week twenty being "cousin bait," we're supposed to talk about the methods we've used to lure in our cousins. 

I think the biggest way I've "cousin baited," is by having such an extensive and exhaustive tree on Ancestry. As of right now, I'm up to 96,887 people.. and there's two big reasons that number is so large. For one -- before I started up my at-home genealogy business, I was on a personal mission to figure out how I was related to every single person buried in Henderson County. Realistically, I documented every (or that I could find) burial in the smaller cemeteries first. (Think small family cemeteries or small community cemeteries. Smaller church graveyards, etc.)

The only cemeteries I had left to do were the ones with about 1,000+ burials which would be Smith Mills Cemetery (in Smith Mills), Saint Augustine (Catholic cemetery - Reed), Mt. Zion Baptist (Reed), St. Louis Cemetery (Catholic cemetery here in the city proper), Fairmont (city cemetery), Roselawn (city cemetery), and lastly our largest cemetery in town -- Fernwood. But considering Fernwood has almost 17,000 memorials on Find-a-Grave... that would probably take me a decade to document. I don't have time to do that anymore. 

For the second reason -- 95% of my genealogy clients have been a cousin of mine in one way or another. My Mom's family having been here in Henderson since within about 15 years of the city's inception.. I'm related to everyone here in SOME way or another. Every time I get a new client, I work their tree until I find a tie into my own... then I just incorporate their information into my own tree. I've actually been able to help out cousins of my clients who stumble across my tree and message asking how I've amassed so much information on their tree if I'm not closely related. I inform them that I'm a genealogist from here in Henderson, that a client of mine was a descendant of (random couple name here) and that they would be your cousin, so I've thoroughly researched this particular line of yours. They're nine times out of ten ecstatic to hear that. 

Another big "cousin bait" for me is family reunions. The last one we had was in 2017 and by that point, I had started my genealogy business and I'd made the front page of the newspaper with the cemetery group (Henderson Ky Cemetery Research Group.) I've always been known as the "family genealogist," and now it was more than just a cute nickname from the family. I'm fortunate that most of the Blanford/LaRue clan are fascinated with genealogy. I did a blog a couple months ago where I rounded up all the DNA descendants (that have tested) of my 2x Grandparents -- Dad LaRue (Charles Clarence LaRue) and Carrie Annie Byrd. 

Blogging has definitely attracted some cousins to come out of the 'woodwork' so to speak. I've connected with a few LaRue cousins via blogging and Mefford cousins, too. The cemetery group, too, has helped some cousins contact me via Facebook. At first they won't know we're related until they start talking about "my __ x Grandparents out in Gibson Cemetery," and I'll respond, "those are my ___ x Grandparents, too. We're cousins." It's amazing just how many of us Hendersonians descend from Gibson patriarch Joel Gibson (1750-1830), originally hailing from Caswell Co, NC, and serving in the Revolutionary War before he made the move to Kentucky and settled in Corydon, KY, around 1813. 

So for me, a heavy online presence/social media presence, the cemetery group, my genealogy page + blog... it's all been successful forms of cousin bait for me. Even Find-a-Grave, which I've had for 11 years, 1 month, and 8 days (as of today, August 12, 2021) has connected me with wonderful cousins. I'll remind y'all about a woman I mentioned several blogs ago named Rosemary Rivette-Lentz. Rosemary and I would be 2nd cousins 2x removed. She reached out to me in 2010  after I'd made my Find-a-Grave and started researching my Mefford/Turner ancestors on there.

Rosemary informed me that my 3x Grandfather, Phylander Turner, had actually fathered a little girl with a neighbor of his, Louiza Tinsley. The little girl, named Rosetta, was only a year and three months older than my 2x Grandmother, Emma Lillie Turner. I don't believe that Phylander ever married Louiza, which is a shame... but without him meeting Lucy Knight and having children with her -- I wouldn't exist, so I can't be too upset. Just five months after Rosetta's birth with Louiza, Phylander married Lucy Knight. 

Louiza Tinsley ended up dying a few years later in 1881 and her parents finished rearing little Rosetta. Obviously it was common knowledge in the Tinsley family who Rosetta's father was but as for our family knowing anything about it -- I still have some relatives who deny it vehemently. DNA doesn't lie, though. 

Sadly, I fell out of contact with Rosemary and since she lived across the U.S., I just figured she got busy with life and whatnot. Her Find-a-Grave status in about 2019 finally changed to "this graver has passed away." Her death date was in 2011! No wonder we fell out of contact! She sent me so many amazing family photos of the Turner side, too. I wouldn't know half of what I know about Phylander Turner if it wasn't for her. I was heartbroken that she'd been gone for so long and I didn't know. 

All in all, if you haven't tried "cousin bait," yourself as an amateur family sleuth or actual genealogist... give it a try sometime. You'll be amazed at the potential cousins that might contact you.