The holidays were honestly never my favorite time of year. My Dad would always make the holidays -- Thanksgiving and Christmas, especially -- such stressful, anxiety riddled experiences. You couldn't enjoy Thanksgiving without being screamed at; and you couldn't enjoy Christmas because every year it was the same old thing, "we aren't buying gifts next year. We're going to spend that $500 or that $1,000 on ourselves." Then it would get to be about two days before Christmas with the family and we'd have to make a mad scramble to Walmart or Sears and buy this person this and that person that and "we have to spend $$ on them because they're spending $ on us." It was miserable, really.
I do miss seeing my family, though. I miss my Grandparents, I miss the occasional laughter, and the good food. I miss making memories with important people. I will never miss the chaotic-ness or the stress, but I will miss the people and the memories, for sure.
They say that holidays are really aimed at children and people who have children - they aren't wrong. I'm 29 next month and no holiday besides my birthday really holds much significance to me because I don't have children. I don't have a kid to spoil with an Easter basket and take on Easter egg hunts. I don't have a kid to 'ooh' and 'aah' at fireworks on the Fourth of July with. I don't have a kid to take trick-or-treating. I don't have a kid to help them make hand-turkey's at Thanksgiving. I don't have a kid to help unwrap Christmas gifts on Christmas morning and marvel at everything 'Santa' brought them.
My Grandma made the holidays bright. My Grandma had an infectious smile and laugh. Even in your darkest hour, she could bring out the light inside of you. Her smile lit up the entire world, and trust me, it's been dark ever since she left this Earth. You might not see the darkness, but I do.
The holidays were usually just myself, Mom, Dad, Grandpa, Grandma, and Uncle Charles. Some years Jay would be there, some years his kids would be there. When I was really young, Christmas was a full family affair but.. I don't have many memories of those Christmases. I do remember my Great-Grandma and her coming for Christmas. We were so close, that's why she sticks out in my mind.
I remember cooking with Grandma for every major holiday. I wish I had a large family to cook for at the holidays, but I never will. We usually had ham at Easter, turkey at Thanksgiving, and ham or something else at Christmas. One year we had steaks at Christmas. I remember my Dad lighting the grill and Grandma telling him, "I want my steak well done." "Glynda, that's an insult to the steak. I can't do that to that poor steak." "I won't eat it if there's any color left in it." My Dad cried while cooking that steak, lol.
Sometimes we'd grill hamburgers and hot dogs for a holiday. Fourth of July or Grandpa's birthday - July 31st.
This is an old photo from the 1980's. My Mom is wearing a Santa hat that is embroidered in glitter with my Grandma's name - Glynda... I have the hat now in the hall closet. It was one thing I absolutely was going to take from my Grandparents house, hell or highwater. My Grandma, or myself, wore it every Christmas.
Here's a photo from the 1970's. My Mom, her brother Jay, my Great-Grandma, and my Grandpa. My Grandma must have taken the photograph. I'm unsure if this is Christmas or Mom and Jay's birthday as they were born January 8th and January 11th... two years and three days apart.
The last holiday we were all together and celebrated was I believe Father's Day 2013.. after that, my Grandma was kidnapped and life continued to go to hell in a handbasket from there.
I know I have some other Christmas photos somewhere, but they aren't on the laptop apparently, so I'll have to share them another time. Gives me more photos to share on another holiday-themed blog post.
I have some photographs of Fourth of July fireworks and Thanksgiving dinners that I can share in future, too, in another holiday themed blog post. :)
First and foremost, I want to apologize in the delay in my writing any blog posts. On June 7th, this laptop took a turn for the worst. It suddenly started saying, "no hard drive found," and I thought it was screwed, for lack of a better term. So on June 8th, I ordered off for a new laptop.
From June 8th until July 2nd, I was using my Uncle's old HP laptop to try and get at least the bare minimum of genealogy done... but I grew more frustrated with it every single day. It was so slow that I wanted to pull my hair out every single time it tried to load a page. On July 2nd, on just a shites and giggles whim, I tried this laptop, and for some reason it was working again -- but the keyboard isn't.
Alas, having worked an online job for years and years... I have a USB/wireless keyboard...so that's what I'm using to type on this laptop. My NEW laptop was meant to be here on July 9th... but it's delayed. I'm guessing Dell is having a hard time getting the parts from China, or Taiwan, or wherever they get their stock parts from. The new revised date is August 4th.
Anyway... onward to the topic at hand: Mother's Day.
--*--*--*--
I thought I'd take a moment to write about each of my maternal ancestors -- the ones I know are 100% at least and talk about my maternal haplogroup (DNA) as well. Upon doing my 23andme, I learned that my maternal haplogroup is H4a.
From the best of what I understand... H4a is one of many haplogroups that is popular among England - which my Mother is heavily English. It, too, has a heavy presence in Sweden, Denmark, Norway, Finland, and other areas you'd consider "Viking territory."
My hypothesis as to why our maternal haplogroup is H4a is the fact that Vikings, as you well know, raided and plundered England many many generations ago. They also started to intermingle with the English settlers... marry, have children, etc. I believe we descend from those Viking/English ancestors.
My direct maternal line starts with my Mother, who was born right here in Henderson County and has remained here her entire life (she's 58 this year). Since she's still living, I won't tell you a whole lot about her in specific.. but beyond her, I'll try and speak a little more in depth about each of my direct maternal ancestors. My Mother takes after her father (James Allen Blanford Sr) and thus has a dark, "farmers tan" style complexion and icy blue eyes.
My Grandmother, Glynda Jane (Sandefur) Blanford was born at home on Letcher St. here in Henderson, Kentucky, on June 13th, 1941. She was the fourth child born to Henry Lloyd Sandefur and Anna Elizabeth Thompson. By the time she was a young girl, the family moved out to the Niagara community in our county. Very rural but very quaint. Sometime in 1961, she met my Grandpa while at the bowling alley with some friends. By March 31st, 1962, they married at Bellfield Baptist Church, which was my Grandma's church. My Grandpa was a Catholic.
My Grandmother was my genealogy partner until she got sick with what we believe was Parkinson's and dementia (not the Alzheimer's that her sisters tried to sell it as.) My Grandma passed away on December 8th, 2015. My Grandmother took after her mother with her dark brown eyes but had a pale complexion. Grandma and Grandpa are buried in St. Louis Cemetery here in Henderson.
My Great-Grandmother, Anna (Thompson) Sandefur was born on August 18th, 1916, at home in the "Walnut Bottom" area of Henderson County, which in today's terms is known as Smith Mills. She was the seventh children born to John Rowan Thompson and Mary Janella Nally. On August 25th, 1933, she and Henry Lloyd Sandefur eloped to Old Shawneetown, Illinois, and married there. Nana, as I called her, is the entire reason I started genealogy. I was fortunate to know her in my youth and I had the curious question of, "did you know any of your Great-Grandparents?" However...she couldn't answer it. She, too, I believe, had Parkinson's and dementia that was stereotyped as Alzheimer's. Nana had an "olive complexion" as we call it. She had dark brown eyes. Nana passed away when I was eight years old, on October 2nd, 2001. Nana and Poppy were of the Baptist faith although Nana would have been raised Catholic. They are buried in Fernwood Cemetery here in Henderson.
My 2x Grandmother, Mary Janella (Nally) Thompson was born a twin of Camilla on October 20th, 1882, in rural Union County, Kentucky. It's likely they lived in the portion of Union County that is close to Smith Mills (which is Henderson County.) Definitely around the Highland Creek area. Her parents were Henry Oliver Nally and Vandalia Delia Gibson. On October 28th, 1902, Janella married her second cousin, John Rowan Thompson. They married in the Catholic church. She had blue eyes and an olive colored complexion, according to my Mom. Maw, as she was called, passed away on December 29th, 1972, of stomach cancer and arteriosclerotic heart disease, the latter she had for a number of years.. She and her husband are buried in Roselawn Memorial Gardens here in Henderson.
My 3x Grandmother, Vandalia Delia (Gibson) Nally was the daughter of John Gregory Gibson and Mahala Caroline Busby, born on December 21st, 1856, in the outskirts of the Corydon/Cairo areas of Henderson County. Vannie, as she was called, married Henry Oliver Nally on January 28th, 1880, in the Old Highland Missionary Baptist Church.. that's surprising as I know the Nally's were Catholic -- but I'm going to go out on a limb and say the Gibson's were of Baptist faith. Vannie birthed two sets of twins... and twins apparently run in the Gibson, Nally, and Thompson families. I have unfortunately never been able to procure a photograph of my 3x Grandparents. Vannie passed away on July 5th, 1949, of arteriosclerotic heart disease of which she had for thirty years. Vannie and Henry are buried in the old Gibson Family Cemetery in Corydon.
My 4x Grandmother, Mahala Caroline Busby, was born in January of 1820, in either Kentucky or Tennessee. In the 1820 census, her parents were listed in Sumner County, Tennessee, IF it's the correct people... but her parents married in 1813 in Henderson County, Kentucky. So, definitely born in Kentucky or Tennessee. She was the daughter of William Busby and Elizabeth Denton. By November 1st, 1841, Mahala was back in Henderson and married John Gregory Gibson. They had an absolute slew of children: 13 if I've counted correctly. at least 5 that died before the age of 20. They populated the county with Gibson's and the Gibson Cemetery with descendants. She and John Gregory are buried in the old Gibson Family Cemetery.
My 5x Grandmother, Elizabeth Denton, was the daughter of Benjamin Denton and Priscilla Rebecca Wiggins; she was born on March 10th, 1790, likely in North Carolina. However, by December 28th, 1813, she lived in Henderson County, KY, where she married William L. Busby. They moved to Tennessee for a short time, where William died in 1830, and Elizabeth returned to Henderson County. Elizabeth herself passed away on March 13th, 1856, in Henderson County, and is buried in Talbott Cemetery in the Robards area of the county. That cemetery is horrendously overgrown and not taken care of. I wish I could see it cleaned up in my lifetime before Elizabeth's tombstone is completely erased from existence. The reason she's buried in that small cemetery of (quite possibly) only five graves is because her daughter, Celia, married a Talbott.
My 6x Grandmother, Priscilla Rebecca "Celia" Wiggins was born in the year of 1755 in the Granville County area of North Carolina to parents Thomas Wiggins and Elizabeth Tabitha Cooper. On November 18th, 1772, in Granville County, Celia married Benjamin Denton. It is reported that Celia died in 1808 in White County, Tennessee. Her husband reportedly died there in 1810. I've never found an actual census record or land record of them being in White County, TN. Their descendants helped populate Henderson County with Denton's that are still in this county to this day!
My 7x Grandmother, Elizabeth Tabitha Cooper, was born about 1735 and married Thomas Wiggins in roughly 1753 in North Carolina. On an application for the Sons of the American Revolution, they say she died around 1764 -- but I think she actually died closer to 1782. She's definitely deceased by 1796 when her husband, Thomas, re-marries to Frances Holman. Thomas passed away in either the last week of 1798 or the first day or two of 1799 as his will was probated on January 3rd, 1799, in Granville County, NC.
Now, beyond Elizabeth (Cooper) Wiggins, I haven't made any DNA connections - which is normal with autosomal DNA. Autosomal DNA... unless you've got some heavy heavy heavy endogamy/intermarrying/inbreeding in the line, you aren't going to make matches with like 9th, 10th, 11th+ cousins. I have indeed made DNA matches with 8th cousins through Elizabeth Cooper & Thomas Wiggins. My Mom has made DNA matches through them as well. It is possible if my Mom does her mtDNA test over at FamilyTreeDNA, we might be able to make matches from further back this line.
So going off of folklore for the rest of this line...
My 8x Grandmother is reportedly Elizabeth (Cannon) Cooper. She was born, roughly, in 1717 likely in Virginia. She married Benjamin Cooper Sr in 1734 in Surry County, Virginia. Elizabeth is said to be the daughter of John Cannon and Mary Price. Her husband, Benjamin, his will was written in 1759 and probated in 1761. It appears by the time he writes his will, that his wife, Elizabeth, has passed away... he does not mention a widow or spouse or wife. I believe their last child was born around 1753.. so it's likely Elizabeth could have died 1755 or sometime around then.
My 9x Grandmother is said to be Mary (Price) Cannon. She likely would have been born around 1691 in Virginia and probably married around 1713 or just after. Her husband, John Cannon, was said to be born about 1688 and died 1734. I can't find any records mentioning them. The only records Mary can be found in are specific to her parents -- John Price and Jane Pugh/Pew.
My 10x Grandmother is supposedly Jane Pugh (or Pew). She is said to have been born in 1659 in Henrico County, Virginia, the daughter of Jane Milner and Henry Pugh/Pew. It is said she married John Price in 1688 in Henrico Co, VA. They have at least five documented children: Mary, Elizabeth, John, Pugh/Pew, and Daniel. John died sometime around 1711 and Jane remarried Hugh Ligon. There were no children born to this union. Hugh is listed as being a descendant of the Plantagenets. Jane is recorded as dying on December 7th, 1713, in Henrico Co, VA. While Jane supposedly doesn't have any famous descendants -- she does have some famous relations according to her Find-a-Grave.
My 11x Grandmother is said to be Jane (Milner) Pugh/Pew. She is supposed to be the daughter of John Milner and Elizabeth Rolfe. Elizabeth is said to have died in childbirth or the day after in 1635. She was born in Henrico County, Virginia. She married Henry Pugh/Pew in about 1658 in Henrico County, VA. Jane and Henry had at least four known children: Mary, Jane, Henry, and Elizabeth Ann. Jane, too, shows famous relations on Ancestry Beta, according to the manager of her Find-a-Grave profile. Jane is recorded as dying in April of 1709, in Henrico County.
My 12x Grandmother is said to be none other than Elizabeth Pierce (Rolfe) Milner. Elizabeth is the daughter of THE John Rolfe (husband of Pocahontas) and his third wife, Jane Pierce. Elizabeth was born January 25th, 1620, in Jamestown, Virginia. Please note that she would have only been 15 years old when she married John Milner, who was at least 17 or 18 years old.. and she only had the one child with him: Jane Milner. It is said she died during or right after childbirth. John Milner was said to be of Nansemond, Virginia.
My 13x Grandmother was Jane (Pierce) Rolfe, the third wife of the John Rolfe -- who had at least one child with Pocahontas. Jane was born about 1595 likely in England and died 1635, reportedly, likely in Virginia. She was the daughter of William Pierce of Virginia who is often confused with Pilgrim/Colonist William Pierce of Massachusettes. She married John Rolfe in 1619 in Virginia and had at least one child: Elizabeth, in 1620 in Jamestown. John Rolfe died in the Indian Massacre of 1622. Three years later, Jane remarried Captain Roger Smith. (To read more on William "Peirce" (Pierce): Click here. It is reported that Jane's first name was spelled "Joane" but it appears historians interchangeably use Joane and Jane. There is a marriage record for a John Rolfe and Joane Pierce in 1612 in New England records, but, we know they couldn't have married that early. In John Rolfe's will, made out in 1621 (he died in 1622), he appointed William Peirce as the guardian of his children. Apparently William Peirce and John Rolfe met in Bermuda after Peirce's ship, on which he was aboard, crashed. His wife and daughter were on a separate ship and arrived safely in Virginia ahead of him.
My 14x Grandmother is said Joane/Jane, wife of William Peirce/Pierce, colonist of Virginia. It is likely that she, too, was born around 1580 and had their only child, Jane, when she was roughly 15 years of age in 1595. She was born in England, like William, and they married there. They did not sail for the new world until 1609. Joane and her daughter, Jane, arrived in Virginia safely as they were on a separate ship from William. William, however, crashed in Bermuda and that's where he met John Rolfe who would later marry his daughter.
This is as far as I can take my direct maternal line. I'm really, really hoping that this information is correct. I would love to be a descendant of Jane (Pierce) Rolfe. It's depressing to not be a Bolling/descendant of Pocahontas, but ya know, being a descendant of John Rolfe is just as neat.
Are any of you descendants of any of these people? Would you like to compare GEDMatch results maybe? My Mom and I both are on there. It's entirely possible we might be 8th cousin sand share a whopping 6 or 7 cM, lol.
It's amazing to think a line of my family has been here in America since 1609 when America didn't even become "America" until 1776. I mean, 1609 is even prior to the Mayflower pilgrims landing at Plymouth Rock. So I can say my family has been here since pre-Mayflower... or at least one branch of it. Very cool in my opinion as a genealogist.
I, like everyone else, probably have more than one ancestor I could write about for "crime and punishment." My paternal Grandmother went to jail a time or two, but, I don't like to muddy her name more than its already been muddy. Even my parents have been to jail for a weekend in their younger years for this and that.
One interesting story I stumbled upon back when I first was playing with newspapers.com back in 2018...
This appeared in the Mt. Sterling Advocate newspaper on September 29th, 1891. Frank Bastin, or rather, Franklin Payton Bastin, was my Great-Great-Grandfather.
Frank was born on August 5th, 1878, in Lincoln County, Kentucky, to Martin Stimmons Bastin and Sarah Jane Brown. The post says Frank Bastin was twelve years old -- but he had actually already had his thirteenth birthday by September 29th.
I believe Frank left Lincoln County and never looked back. By October 17th, 1895, he married in Campbell County, TN, to Miss Ilena "Lena" Singleton. In the 1900 census, they're living in Laurel County, KY. Then they make the move in about 1905 or 1906 to Muhlenberg County, KY, where my Great-Grandmother, Edith, was born in 1908.
I'm not sure if Frank Bastin left Lincoln County before he could ever go to court -- or perhaps because Joe Henry lived, they told him to just "get the hell out of dodge," if you will. Joe Henry, according to death certificates, lived to be 69 years old -- dying in 1941. Cause of death appears to be diabetes.
Regardless, had Frank not left Lincoln County, KY... I may not be here today had this incident not occurred. Surely this incident and his leaving Lincoln County is how he met Ilena Singleton -- as she hailed from Rockcastle County, KY. Perhaps Rockcastle County is where Frank ended up after leaving Lincoln.. Then they married in TN and set up their first house in Laurel County.. but then continued heading west to Muhlenberg.
Frank and Lena had eleven children together -- four that died as young infants. Frank was the first to pass away on January 15th, 1954, in Central City, KY. He was 75 years old and succumbed to diabetes. Lena followed him in death on May 18th, 1958, in Central City. She was 78 years old and succumbed to pancreatic cancer (or rather, on the death cert. "probable carcinoma of the head of pancreas.")
One thing is for sure.. Frank Bastin lived an exciting life; one that I wish I could hear more stories about, but unfortunately it seems, he took most of his stories to his grave with him. My Granddad (his grandson) didn't even know about him stabbing someone at thirteen years old, so it's obviously something Frank didn't like to talk about. Aren't those always the best stories for us genealogists? The juicy gossip kind.
If you ever get down to Central City, KY; stop by Rose Hill Cemetery and pay him and Ilena a visit, will you? Maybe he'll be willing to share a story or two from his childhood or early teen years with you.
I've already written about my Grandparents house being one of my favorite places growing up, and I've written quite a few times about the Gibson Cemetery being the cemetery that really made me fall in love with old family cemeteries. I could probably write about how much I love our library and it's genealogy department, or maybe a restaurant I love to eat at.
But I think the best thing I could write about for "favorite place," that also goes along with a "favorite ancestral home," is my hometown and where I still currently reside...
Henderson, Kentucky.
Henderson was originally known as "Red Banks" to the Native American tribes that lived on this land. In 1775, a man named Richard Henderson tried to purchase over 17,000,000 acres of land between the Ohio, Kentucky, and Cumberland rivers in what is currently Kentucky and Tennessee. Known back then as the Transylvania Purchase (because their little outfit was known as the Transylvania Company.)
Unfortunate for Henderson, the sale ended up resulting in only 200,000 acres to develop. Richard Henderson hired famed Daniel Boone to survey the country and select favorable areas.. Unfortunately, Henderson passed away before he could ever come west and see the land he'd bought.
General Samuel Hopkins and Thomas Allin, a surveyor, came to Red Banks in the year of 1797. They began to lay out the plans of what would later be known as Henderson -- named for Richard Henderson and his dream of a town west of the Alleghany mountains.
While surveying, Hopkins and Allin agreed upon wide streets, so fires could not easily jump across the street. Today, this allows Henderson to have slanted parking spaces everywhere downtown -- instead of parallel parking like in most downtown areas in other cities.
While Richard Henderson is the namesake -- Samuel Hopkins is certainly the Father of Henderson. In 1792, before "Henderson" came to be.. not counting the local Cherokee population, "Red Banks" only had 62 free male inhabitants. By October 29th, 1799, after "Henderson" was created -- a census for the city reported a population of 183. The county as a whole had 423 residents, 207 slaves, and 412 horses.
A post office was officially put in place in Henderson in 1801. Our zip code today is 42420 -- but a lot of downtown businesses and P.O. boxes use zip code 42419. Henderson continued to expand and by the mid-1850's, Henderson had grown to be the largest producer of tobacco in the world, most of it being exported to Great Britain at the time.
At the beginning of the 1900's, Henderson was said to have had more millionaires per capita than any other city in the world. Tobacco was still booming... until the First World War. Great Britain implemented such a high tax on tobacco that it drove the business out in this area for good. Local farmers, even today, still grow a little tobacco but.. it'll never be the craze that it was from the mid 1850's to pre-First World War.
In the 1920's, 1930's, and 1940's, Henderson garnered attention and was referred to as "Little Chicago" because of how much illegal gambling in nightclubs happened here. In the 1950's and 1960's, they began to clean up the town considerably and nightclubs became a thing of the past.
Samuel Hopkins resided out towards the "Graham Hill" area of Henderson County, just outside of Henderson city limits, and is buried in his family cemetery there. His residence was known as "Spring Garden." The young daughter of naturalist, John James Audubon, is said to be buried there as well.
Yes, Henderson garners most of its fame for being home to John James Audubon for the early part of the 1800's. Audubon owned a grist mill right on the Ohio River in downtown Henderson and today that area is known as "Audubon Mill Park." We are home to the John James Audubon State Park and Museum on the north end of town.
Henderson was also home to famous blues musician W.C. Handy for much of his life -- so we celebrate him and his legacy with the W.C. Handy Blues Festival every June in Audubon Mill Park. Another famous musician, "Grandpa" Jones, a banjo player who made it big on such shows as Hee-Haw was born in Henderson County, in "Niagara" to be exact; a little community just south-east of the city proper.
During the Civil War, Adam "Stovepipe" Johnson, a Henderson native, rose to fame for taking Newburgh, Indiana for the Confederacy with a "stovepipe" he fashioned to look like a cannon. He took Newburgh on a literal bluff.
During WW2, most notably the Pearl Harbor disaster -- the man who got a lot of the blame unjustly placed on him, Admiral Husband E. Kimmel, commander of the U.S. Pacific Fleet, was born and raised here. The Kimmel Homestead was roughly between 5th and 6th Streets off of Green Street (our main thoroughfare through town.)
We've been home to a few congressmen, senators, and the like. John Young Brown, A.B. "Happy" Chandler, James Franklin Clay, John Lloyd Dorsey Jr, Lazarus Whitehead Powell, Augustus Owsley Stanley, to name a few.
We've had a few authors come out of our area like Debbie Dadey, Lucy Furman, Joey Goebel, Maralea Arnett, and more.
Henderson is home to Metzger's Tavern, which proudly holds the title of the oldest continuously operating tavern in the entire state of Kentucky -- opening in 1887.
Henderson is situated on the Green River as well -- or at least, part of the county is. Green River meets up with the Ohio in what is known as the "Scuffletown Bottoms" very near communities such as Spottsville and Beals. It runs down through our county coming into contact with communities like Hebbardsville, Bluff City, and Niagara. The Green River, in part of the county, is the "divide" between Henderson County and McLean County. The Ohio River is the divide between Kentucky and Indiana.
Henderson is also famous for being where Mother's Day was first celebrated in 1887. Mary Towles Sasseen isn't officially credited as the originator of Mother's Day -- no, the honor was stolen out from under her by a woman named Ann Jarvis. Sasseen was a schoolteacher here in Henderson County and it is recorded that she put together a Mother's Day program for her students as early as 1887. Her cousin, Susan Towles, was one of Henderson's most prestigious librarians. The Towles family was quite affluent in the area.
Spottsville is home to one of only two revolving train bridges left operating in the world.
Our "town square" which is called "Central Park" and is home to our county courthouse -- Central Park is the oldest park west of the Alleghany mountains. The park used to be home to the county jail and was even once the public lynching area.
Henderson has many cemeteries with many notable and prominent people buried in them. I could write a different blog sometime about all of them. I could probably go on for hours about random facts about Henderson - like it being home to Ellis Park which was built in 1922, of course it's gone through a few name changes since then.
I could also write a whole blog about all the schools in our area and the changes they've gone through since 1797. Same with the churches in the community, and all the little towns throughout the county. They all have their own interesting histories.
I think I've given you quite a good glimpse at Henderson's history and how it came to be and what all makes Henderson special. Now I need to get down to the genealogical aspect of why Henderson is my favorite place ancestrally.
My paternal side isn't from the Henderson area -- but my maternal side is. By the 1810 census, my 5x Grandparents -- Bennett Sandefur and Judith Bilbo had come to Henderson County, Kentucky. By 1813, my 5x Grandparents married here -- Thomas Watson and Rebecca Copeland. By 1812, another set of my 5x Grandparents married here -- Joshua Moss and Sarah Adkins "Sallie" Griffin.
Some more of my early ancestors was my 4x Grandmother Joshua Jarrett who died here in 1849. My 5x Grandparents, Joel Gregory & Nancy Lester were here by the mid 1830's. Nancy died here in 1835 and Joel remarried in 1836.
My 5x Grandparents, Daniel Hazelwood Jr and Susannah Smith were here by the mid 1830's.. Daniel dying here in 1836. My 5x Grandfather Hiram McDonald came here by 1825 from New York and married a local woman, Susan Hust; my 5x Grandmother.
My 3x Grandfather, Ben LaRue, came here by the 1860's and married Mary Philapine Lawrey in 1867 - my 3x Grandmother. Her parents, Robert Lawrey & Elizabeth Hill were here by the 1860 census.
Of course, I've written about him several times before -- my 6x Grandfather Joel Gibson and his sons were in the Henderson County area between 1810 and 1820. I believe they arrived in 1813 to be exact. My 5x Grandparents married here in 1813 -- William L. Busby and Elizabeth Denton.
The rest of my lines -- Blanford, Nally, Thompson, etc.. They're Catholic. They came to the Union County area, first, as part of a Catholic migration from Eastern Kentucky (the Nelson, Washington, Hardin county areas.) They're newer to Henderson County than the previously mentioned lines.
My direct ancestors do have same family graveyards throughout the county. Joshua Moss and his wife are buried in one Moss Cemetery in the Niagara area and then my 4x Grandparents are buried in what's called the "W.J. Moss Family Cemetery" in Niagara. His name was William Jackson Moss.
Daniel Hazelwood and his progeny are buried in the Hazelwood Family Cemetery out towards Hebbardsville. Of course, the Gibson Family Cemetery's (two of them) in Corydon where the Gibson Plantation was located right off of J. Gibson (named for Joel, I believe) Road.
Elizabeth (Denton) Busby is buried here in Talbott Cemetery in Robards. The rest of my lines are buried in either city cemeteries, church graveyards, or their graves are lost to time, sadly. A lot of my ancestors, even if I know where they're buried.. they no longer have tombstones or at least, not legible ones.
My roots being here in Henderson County since 1810 -- it's no wonder that I love my hometown and really have no desire to leave here. A lot of my friends think I'm crazy for not wanting to escape this "hell hole" as some call it. The people here can sometimes be... urgh. I can say that, I'm related to everyone here, haha. But this place is so beautiful and has such a vast, rich history that.. I can't imagine ever leaving it.
I wish there was a Pioneer Society of Henderson County. I'd love to join something such as that. I know we have a local Daughters of the American Revolution chapter, which I could absolutely join through Joel Gibson, but.. my family helped build this town into what it is today. I wish they could be recognized for their efforts.
In some of the history books talking about Robards, it does mention my 5x Grandfather, Bennett Sandefur, as helping found the town along with Reuben Moss, my 4x Grandfather's brother. Jordan Moss, my 1st cousin 6x removed is also listed. Others like George Robards, George Eakins, Enoch Spencer, Thomas Rideout, Ben Wall, Nathan Smith, T.W. Royster, James McMullin, and Samuel McMullin Sr are also credited and I'm related to them as well.
George Robards was the husband of my 1st cousin 6x removed, Martha Moss. George Eakins was the husband of my 3rd cousin 8x removed, Sarah Elizabeth Melton. Enoch Spencer was the husband of my 1st cousin 6x removed, Abigail Denton. Thomas Rideout was the father-in-law of my 2nd cousin 5x removed, Martha Jane McAndrew.
Benjamin "Ben" Wall was the husband of my 1st cousin 6x removed, Mary Sandefur Bugg. Nathan Smith was the grandfather of the husband of my 3rd cousin 4x removed, Mary Frances Wall. T.W. Royster (Thomas Wilkins Royster) was the father-in-law of my 2nd cousin 5x removed, Tabitha Jane Spencer.
James McMullin was the father-in-law of my 3rd cousin 4x removed, Mary Emily Robards. Samuel McMullin Sr was the grandfather of the wife of my 3rd cousin 4x removed, Socrates Brackett.
So when I tell you I'm related to everyone from Henderson County, Kentucky... I'm really not joking. My Ancestry tree is up to 94,719 people and it grows by at least a hundred people every couple of days. Before I started up my genealogy business in November of 2016, starting in 2011, I was on a personal mission to figure out how I was related to every single person buried in Henderson County. I started with the smaller family cemeteries and I just about had them all finished. I'd say, realistically, I got about 45% of the way done when I started up my genealogy business and no longer had time to compile my extensive research on each and every cemetery in the county (about four binders full so far.)
I got a bit windier with this blog post than I intended, but I'm glad to have introduced you to Henderson, Kentucky, the place I'm extremely happy to call home. I'm very happy that my roots go as far back into the history of this great place as they do. I'll have to go much more in depth about some of the stuff I touched on in this blog at some point in the future. Maybe there will be a good topic sometime soon that some of this stuff will fit. :)
Thank you for reading. If you enjoy my writing, please follow my blog, it would mean a lot to me!
Charles Clarence LaRue was born on June 8th, 1883, in Henderson County, Kentucky, to Benjamin Hardin LaRue and Mary Philapine Lawrey.
Carrie Annie Byrd was born on October 28th, 1884, in Henderson County, Kentucky, to John Byrd and Maria Moore.
They were married on April 27th, 1904, in Henderson County, Kentucky.
Together, they reared eleven children -- with three of them dying as young children. Through those eight children that lived to adulthood and had children of their own, they became the Grandparents of at least 63 grandchildren. I'm not even going to sit here tonight and try to count how many great-grandchildren, great-great-grandchildren, and now even great-great-great-Grandchildren that this wonderful couple has.
Carrie was the first to pass on June 29th, 1955, at the age of 70; leaving Charles, or "Charlie" as he was known throughout the community, a widower. A few years later, he would re-marry to the double (or perhaps triple) widow and once divorced: Sarah Jane (Beck) Hallmark Roberts Wise Staser.
"Miss Sarah" or "Miss Staser" as her step-children and step-Grandchildren called her - was born Sarah Jane Beck on October 9th, 1887, in Henderson County, Kentucky. She was the daughter of John P. Beck and Alice Logsdon. Her first cousin, Thomas Jesse Beck, married Charles LaRue's sister -- Laura Pearl LaRue.
"Miss Sarah" married first to John Luta Hallmark on November 14th, 1903, in Posey County, Indiana. After having a passel of children, they divorced sometime around 1917-1918 and then she married a Roberts. I'm unsure what the first name of the Roberts man was...but he must have died shortly after their marriage. Sarah "Roberts" married again on August 17tth, 1921, in Posey County, Indiana, to Martin Van Buren Wise. He, too, died very shortly afterward. By late 1922 or early 1923, she married George Charles Staser, who he remained married to until his death in 1950.
Miss Sarah, too, passed away before Charles on February 26th, 1976; leaving him a now double widower. Charles "Dad" LaRue eventually passed away himself on November 20th, 1980, at the age of 97.
Growing up, I've heard stories not just from my Grandpa Jady but from my Mom as well. Dad LaRue was quite a character from what I gather. He loved a good joke, a hard-to-solve puzzle or riddle, and could pull off a decent prank every now and again. Charlie loved to use his mind and apparently was interested in his family tree. An interest that he apparently passed down to several of his descendants, including myself.
That finally brings me to why I'm writing about my Great-Great-Grandparents, Charles and Carrie (Byrd) LaRue for the topic of "DNA."
I've tested through Ancestry and 23andme, uploaded for free to My Heritage, Family Tree DNA, GEDMatch, and Living DNA. There are LaRue/Byrd descendants on Ancestry, 23andme, My Heritage, and ftDNA. Counting up (so far) all of the descendants, including myself and my Mom, who have DNA tested... the number has come out to 39.
39 descendants of Dad LaRue and Carrie Byrd have done their DNA on one (or more) website(s). I wonder what this couple would think of that today. I wonder what Dad LaRue would think about having all the descendants that he does. He apparently didn't realize he had half as big of a family as what he did.
Charlie's father, Benjamin Hardin "Ben" LaRue was born in December of 1844, likely in Hardin County, Kentucky, to Josiah "Si" LaRue and Mary Castleman. He was one of at least eleven children. His parents, though, I believe died by the time Ben turned 10 or so years old.. How and why Ben LaRue ended up in Henderson County is a mystery to me... perhaps he came with relatives. Perhaps he came on his own. Perhaps he followed a Church congregation... I'm really unsure. But we know by September 3rd, 1867, Ben is living in Henderson County, as he married his wife, Mary Philapine Lawrey, here on that date.
Growing up -- Ben told his children nothing of his parents or siblings -- or at least, not much. In the 1970's, Charlie's daughter, Lorene (my great-grandmother) wrote into a local newspaper for help finding family of Ben LaRue at the behest of her father. I believe she had some answers because my Mom remembers a road trip that she took, during the mid 1980's (after Charlie's death, unfortunately), with her parents and Grandparents, to go out west. Somewhere in Kansas, my Great-Grandma Lorene met some of her LaRue cousins. Most likely, they came through one of Ben LaRue's brothers.
Today, I have a very good idea of what happened to almost all of Ben LaRue's siblings. His parents definitely disappear between the 1850-1860 census years.. so I believe they both died. Perhaps of an epidemic? Cholera perhaps?
Ben's brother's Samuel & Jim married the Burdine sisters and headed west for Arkansas.
Their brother, William, jumped around between Kansas, Missouri, and Arkansas after marrying a Burnett.
Their brother, Jacob, married three different times (two times to a couple Petty's) out in Kansas.
It appears their brother, Squire, stayed in the Hardin County, KY, area and married a Stopher (Stofer) woman.
Their brother, David, also married a Petty girl and moved to Kansas.
Their sister, Sarah, I believe died in 1864 -- likely buried in Hardin County, Kentucky.
Thomas married a Talbot and moved to Kansas and apparently had nothing but a slew of daughters -- so I don't believe any of them passed on the LaRue name.
Elizabeth, only appearing in the 1850 census and being 2 years old.. probably died around the same time her parents, Josiah and Mary, did.
Lastly, Lydia, married a Burdine (brother to the Burdine sisters) and stayed in the Hardin County area.
If there were any more children of Josiah and Mary between 1850 census taking and their deaths... I've never found them. Only the married children have I been able to find in an 1860 census. Even my 3x Grandfather, Ben LaRue, I cannot find in an 1860 census. I ponder if the youngest LaRue children (those under 18 and unwed at the time of their parents deaths) were placed in an orphanage or something similar. Perhaps this could be why Ben was apprehensive and reluctant to tell his children about any of his siblings or his parents.
Ben LaRue is a widower by the time of the 1900 census -- his wife, Mary, likely dying in the 1890's. Ben, too, died by January 1st, 1901. I've heard that he and Mary are buried, unmarked, in the Smith Mills Cemetery. Dad LaRue, Carrie, and some of their children reside in Smith Mills Cemetery, too.
For the last portion of this "DNA" topic -- I'm going to show you just how differently you and a parent can match the same person. DNA is such a random inheritance. You can match siblings of one another at completely different levels! For sake of privacy, I will be using initials only because all of these DNA matches are still living. Some of these cousins have only tested at 23andme, and so far, my Mom hasn't used her 23andme kit yet, so I don't know her cM numbers for those matches so I'll only be reporting my cM values for those. I will be separating these matches as to which child of Dad LaRue and Carrie Byrd that they descend from, starting off with the one I descend from.
Verna Lorene LaRue, my Great-Grandmother October 9th, 1914 / May 8th, 1991 Married Richard Jerome Blanford on July 11th, 1931 Mother of 13 children, only 8 of which had children of their own. Grandmother of 29. I couldn't begin to count up how many great-grandchildren and great-great-grandchildren Lorene and Dick have.
First and foremost, me and my Mom share 3,443 cM with each other. A number that high will always be a parent/child relationship unless you are an identical twin or you've accidentally done your DNA two times and then of course, you'll match yourself as "Self/Twin".
D. B. -- Great-grandson of Dad LaRue & Carrie Byrd Mom's 1st cousin -- 1,228cM My 1st cousin 1x removed -- 565 cM
W. B. -- Great-grandson Mom's 1st cousin -- My 1st cousin 1x removed -- 537 cM
L. C. -- 2x Granddaughter Mom's 1st cousin 1x removed -- 651 cM My 2nd cousin -- 331 cM
L. I. -- 2x Grandson Mom's 1st cousin 1x removed -- 638 cM My 2nd cousin -- 326 cM
S. H. -- 2x Granddaughter Mom's 1st cousin 1x removed -- 660 cM My 2nd cousin -- 291 cM
S. B. -- 2x Granddaughter Mom's 1st cousin 1x removed -- 654 cM My 2nd cousin -- 283 cM
L. H. -- 2x Granddaughter Mom's 1st cousin 1x removed -- 455 cM My 2nd cousin -- 248 cM
T. B. -- 3x Granddaughter Mom's 1st cousin 2x removed -- 108 cM My 2nd cousin 1x removed -- 37 cM
Opal Lois LaRue March 22nd, 1922 / August 27th, 2006 Married Thomas Allen "Tom" Blanford on June 22nd, 1940 Mother of 14 children, Grandmother of at least 29 (There's a few of Opal & Tom's kids that I don't believe have ever been married or had children).
These cousins would be DOUBLE cousins for those of us who are descended from Lorene & Richard. Why? Because Lorene & Opal are sisters -- Richard & Thomas were brothers.
D. C. -- Granddaughter of Dad LaRue & Carrie Byrd Mom's double 1st cousin 1x removed -- 1,067 cM My double 1st cousin 2x removed -- 470 cM
J. C. -- Great-granddaughter Mom's double 2nd cousin -- 483 cM My double 2nd cousin 1x removed -- 265 cM
A. J. -- 2x Granddaughter Mom's double 2nd cousin 1x removed -- My double 3rd cousin -- 191 cM
M. B. -- 2x Granddaughter Mom's double 2nd cousin 1x removed -- My double 3rd cousin -- 103 cM
Bonnie Wyonia LaRue March 25th, 1916 / March 19th, 2002 Married Martin Albert Ganno on April 21st, 1934. Mother of 11 children, Grandmother of at least 30.
D. G. -- Grandson of Dad LaRue & Carrie Byrd Mom's 1st cousin 1x removed -- 622 cM My 1st cousin 2x removed -- 404 cM
B. B. -- Granddaughter Mom's 1st cousin 1x removed -- 686 cM My 1st cousin 2x removed -- 390 cM
J. B. -- Great-grandson Mom's 2nd cousin -- 418 cM My 2nd cousin 1x removed -- 253 cM
K. G. -- Great-granddaughter Mom's 2nd cousin -- 295 cM My 2nd cousin 1x removed -- 172 cM
J. B. -- 2x Grandson Mom's 2nd cousin 1x removed -- 254 cM My 3rd cousin -- 108 cM
A. B. -- 2x Grandson Mom's 2nd cousin 1x removed -- 190 cM My 3rd cousin -- 71 cM
S. P. -- 2x Granddaughter Mom's 2nd cousin 1x removed -- 141 cM My 3rd cousin -- 33 cM
D. T. -- Great-granddaughter Mom's 2nd cousin -- My 2nd cousin 1x removed -- 211 cM
T. M. -- 2x Granddaughter Mom's 2nd cousin 1x removed -- My 3rd cousin -- 82 cM
Woodrow Wilson "Woody" LaRue November 2nd, 1912 / November 11th, 1974 Married Mary Myrtle Culver on June 29th, 1930 Father of 9 children, grandfather of at least 26.
R. L. -- Grandson of Dad LaRue & Carrie Byrd Mom's 1st cousin 1x removed -- 582 cM My 1st cousin 2x removed -- 318 cM
T. B. -- Great-granddaughter Mom's 2nd cousin -- 395 cM My 2nd cousin 1x removed -- 213 cM
T. J. -- Great-granddaughter Mom's 2nd cousin -- 293 cM My 2nd cousin 1x removed -- 171 cM
M. B. -- Great-granddaughter Mom's 2nd cousin -- 207 cM My 2nd cousin 1x removed -- 112 cM
K. F. -- 2x Grandson Mom's 2nd cousin 1x removed -- 136 cM My 3rd cousin -- 60 cM
G. Z -- Great-granddaughter Mom's 2nd cousin -- 768 cM My 2nd cousin 1x removed -- 426 cM
Ann Bessie Louise LaRue August 20th, 1918 / January 10th, 2008 Married Joseph Willard Buckman on October 3rd, 1940 Mother of 6, Grandmother of 21
J. B. -- Grandson of Dad LaRue & Carrie Byrd Mom's 1st cousin 1x removed -- 588 cM My 1st cousin 2x removed -- 419 cM
H. C. -- 2x Grandson Mom's 2nd cousin 1x removed -- 168 cM My 3rd cousin -- 116 cM
K. C. -- 2x Granddaughter Mom's 2nd cousin 1x removed -- 116 cM My 3rd cousin -- 98 cM
H. C. -- 2x Granddaughter Mom's 2nd cousin 1x removed -- 212 cM My 3rd cousin -- 76 cM
A. C. -- Great-granddaughter Mom's 2nd cousin -- My 2nd cousin 1x removed -- 215 cM
Shelby Clark LaRue June 19th, 1905 / August 11th, 1979 Married Amie Lelia Blades on December 6th, 1940 Legal father of 3 children, and 1 child I discovered he had before he married through DNA testing; Grandfather of 6, +2 more if you count the grandchildren through the child he didn't know about.
A. Y. -- Great-grandson of Dad LaRue & Carrie Byrd Mom's 2nd cousin -- 303 cM My 2nd cousin 1x removed -- 159 cM
A. E. -- 2x Grandson Mom's 2nd cousin 1x removed -- 240 cM My 3rd cousin -- 58 cM
S. W. -- 2x Granddaughter Mom's 2nd cousin 1x removed -- My 3rd cousin -- 86 cM
Rosa Lee LaRue December 31st, 1909 / January 19th, 1988 Married first to Benona Houston Alstadt Sr, second to Ray Alvin Miles. Mother of 2 children (one by each husband), Grandmother of 3.
C. A. -- Great-granddaughter of Dad LaRue & Carrie Byrd Mom's 2nd cousin -- 248 cM My 2nd cousin 1x removed -- 148 cM
D. D. -- 3x Granddaughter Mom's 2nd cousin 2x removed -- 29 cM My 3rd cousin 1x removed -- 17 cM
And then surprisingly... no descendants of Uncle Jimmy have tested, yet.
James Alma "Jimmy" LaRue March 22nd, 1924 / December 25th, 1988 Married Sue Catherine Mills. Father of 4 children, Grandfather of at least 8.
I'm incredibly surprised no one from his line have tested yet.. or if they have, I haven't run across them yet (ruh-roh!)
By the number of grandchildren I counted up... Dad LaRue & Carrie Byrd should roughly have 154 great-grandchildren. I would go out on a limb to say that it isn't impossible to say that Dad & Carrie might have anywhere from 250-300 2x Grandchildren (myself being one of them.) That number is absolutely astonishing to me. Mind boggling. Perplexing. Astounding. I would love to see the look on Charles & Carrie's faces, today, in 2021 if I were to tell them they possibly had 154 great-grandkids and as many as 300 great-great-grandchildren. I bet they'd be bewildered.
I'll wrap this blog up with a thank you for reading through all of this, and thank you to all of my LaRue/Byrd cousins for DNA testing at the various websites available. It makes this genealogist cousin of yours extremely happy! Please urge our other cousins to test if they possibly can, and if any of you need any help with your tests or test results... send me a message on my Facebook!
The topic for week fifteen is "brickwall," and for me there's nothing better to write about than Brickwall Cemetery. This cemetery is a "hidden gem," if you will, located out in the Beals, Henderson County, Kentucky area. As far as what we've been told, it's on "Beasley property." We knocked on the door of the house and nobody answered -- so we left a note on the door with our numbers, letting them know we were going to go back and check out the cemetery, that if they had any problems or questions, to just call our cell phones. No one ever contacted us.
It's located about 3/4 mile off of Highway 811 - off the right side of the road if you're heading down 811. If you're heading back towards US 60, it would be on the left side of the road. It seems like there's a "farm road" that leads you back there, kind of.. where they probably take the combines in and out of the field. It's definitely something I wouldn't drive back to, unless you're on a four-wheeler. I would honestly walk it, if I were you.
This is a GPS pinpoint that I put onto Find-a-Grave when we went out to the cemetery in August of 2014. I'd like to get out there again because honestly, middle of August wasn't the best time to go. The leaves were thick and hid a lot of tombstones, I have no doubt. Plus, I didn't know about the method of prodding for tombstones beneath the ground (that might be buried by dirt and hidden from view) that I know about now.
Here is another map showing you the roads that are nearby. Highway 811 is what it's technically "off" of but Highland Rd is very near. Across 811 is "Ohio River Rd #2" and Cheatham Rd runs between 811 and Highland "behind" the cemetery if you will.
As far as I can tell, Brickwall was started in the 1830's to early 1840's. It served the community of Beals and whatever other small "river communities" that are close by such as Scuffletown, Vanada, etc. Supposedly, the cemetery got its name because of the brick walls that surrounded the cemetery. When we went out there in 2014, you could still see remnants of the original entrance to the cemetery and all the bricks laying around.
I was told in an e-mail years ago, I forget who from now, that back in the possibly 1920's or 1930's (I forget which decade.. don't shoot me, I'm just the messenger) that hogs, I'm guessing wild hogs, got into the cemetery and rooted up a lot of the bones, scattering them about. They said that the hogs destroyed quite a many tombstones, too.
From what I can tell, the earliest tombstone that can be made out is for Robert McCormick. Robert was born in abt 1801 and died March 20th, 1842. His tombstone says he was 41 years of age.
From my genealogical records, Robert McCormick was the son of George Elliot McCormick (1771-1849) and Jane Steele (1774-1843). Robert was the husband of Nancy Griffin. I believe they were married about 1829 in probably Henderson County, Kentucky. I've found them in the 1830 census and they haven't bore a child yet. Their first born was Carneal Boone McCormick (1831-1904.) By 1840, it appears they have another son and a daughter.. I believe the son is a Fenwick McCormick, born 1834. Not sure who the daughter was. It is possible that Nancy (Griffin) McCormick and the other McCormick children are in Brickwall Cemetery, too, just with lost tombstones.
The newest death I was able to find in the cemetery was that of Cordelia J. Meredith, young daughter of Lonnie Meredith and Cordie Price. She was born September 30th, 1936, and died October 6th, 1936. No tombstone was found for Cordelia but her death certificate states a burial in Brickwall.
The newest tombstone seems to be a new tombstone erected for the Beasley family. Emma Smith was the daughter of Wiliam Smith and Polly Wells. She was born June 26th, 1854, and passed on May 16th, 1918. She married David Morris Beasley sometime between 1880-1883. He died sometime between 1893-1900 and is probably buried in Brickwall Cemetery, too.
Emma shares a new tombstone with her grandchildren: Walter, September 8th 1908 -- September 12th, 1908; Johnie O, August 8th, 1909 -- October 29th, 1910; and Edgar M, February 24th, 1914 -- April 9th, 1914. They were children of William Ambrose Beasley and his wife, Susie Ann Morris.
Other last names buried in this cemetery include: Allen, Babin Barger, Billings, Bolen, Bugg, Burd, Chaney, Dixon, Everett, Folden, Gildersleeve, Goldsberry, Gray, Greathouse, Hardin, Hill, Holmes, Horn, Hust, Lacer, LeGrand, Ligon, Masterson, McCallister, McDonald, McLean, Oldham, Parker, Purcell, Robinson, Scales, Shelby, Skaggs, Smith, Strange, Thompson, Wait, Weddle, White, Williams, and Yates.
There appears to be one Civil War tombstone in the cemetery -- Stephen "Steve" Gildersleeve. He was born October 15th, 1847, in Butler County, Kentucky. It appears he married Milly Phelps in Butler County, KY, in 1865. He enlisted on August 12th, 1862, and by November 17th, 1862, he was assigned to the 12th Kentucky Cavalry. He was on the Union Side. He mustered out on August 23rd, 1865. According to his application for a tombstone -- he died November 30th, 1901, in Spottsville, Kentucky. It appears that Steve was the son of Joel Gildersleeve from New York and Elizabeth McDonald from Ohio. By 1870, the family lived in Union County, KY, but then moved on over to Henderson County by 1880. Their daughter, Annie, married a Billings and some of their infant children are buried in Brickwall.
Without a doubt as of 2014 -- the cemetery was in major disrepair. It desperately needed cleaning.. old tombstones needed cleaning and fixing. Trees needed to be downed and brush needed to be removed.. I can only hope a lot of descendants can gather together in the coming time and fix up the cemetery. There's a lot of history in it, a lot of ancestors that probably half of Henderson are descended from but they don't even know it.. It's always so sad to see a cemetery fall into this shape. They farm all of the land around it, so I guess it's a blessing that the cemetery hasn't been removed completely (yet).
If you're a descendant or a relative of any of these families and you're ever in the Beals, KY, area... try and stop by. I'm sure it'll be worth your visit. If it's summer time though, be sure you wear your hiking clothing and spray down REAL GOOD with spray to combat the ticks and mosquitos!
I've been a week or so behind in the topics for 52 Ancestors, so I clicked on the prompt for Week 14 and it was the word, "Great." I'm sitting there thinking... GREAT. What in the world do I write for that? I scrolled to the bottom of the page and noticed that Barb LaFara decided to write about her Great Aunts and Great Uncles! That's a great idea!!
And then I sat here and counted.... I have 33. I have 33 Great-Aunts and Great-Uncles, not including the spouses. *inserts face-palm emoji here, if I were able to...* This might take a little while.
My Granddad, Glen Mefford, was one of eleven children. My Grandma, Mina (Jones) Hendrix Mefford was one of seven children. My Grandpa, Jady Blanford, was one of thirteen children. Lastly, my Grandma Glynda, was one of six children.
Let's start with...
The Mefford's
1) Billie Mefford; November 28th, 1927 -- March 27th, 1931
2) Mary Ellen Mefford; December 11th, 1929 -- July 21st, 2009. Married at least four times and had a son with three of them.. her first son being a Fleming, second son being a Mason, and third son being a Confrey. My Great-Aunt Mary is who helped me get started with my Mefford genealogy. She wasn't able to help me, honestly, with the Bastin's, but she was who told me about her parents -- Clint & Edith, her Grandparents -- French & Lillie, and her Great-Grandparents, Phylander & Lucy.
3) Barbara Ray Mefford; June 2nd, 1933 (still living). I think I've met her one time at Aunt Mary's funeral, but she lives in Chicago and is married to a Palmer. She wasn't able to come to my Granddad's funeral.. distance, COVID, and bad health.
4) Ima Jean Mefford; January 14th, 1936 -- August 21st, 2013. Married at least three times -- to a Summers, Durbin, and Atzinger. Her children are with the Summers marriage.
5) This would be my Granddad Glen's place in the birth order.
6) Clinton "Clint" Mefford Jr; June 29th, 1940 -- February 1st, 1941.
7) Wanda Lee Mefford; December 4th, 1942 -- January 1st, 1943.
8) Owen Lee Mefford; April 22nd, 1944 (still living). Uncle Owen is married to Carol Fulkerson and I'm glad to say they're both interested in their family tree and family history. I'm really glad to know them!
9) Vernon Lee Mefford; September 18th, 1946 (still living). Uncle Vernon lives up towards Indianapolis, so I've only met him a number of times. He's quite a character. I think he's been married a couple different times, unsure if he's currently wed or not. He runs the business "Swings by Mefford." I believe he's made a porch swing for former President Bush (I think the younger President Bush, not Sr.) and for John Mellencamp.
10) Michael Wayne Mefford; December 28th, 1949 (still living). Uncle Mike is our money man.. he's worked for Hilliard Lyons in the past and knows his stuff about the stock market and whatnot. He's married and unfortunately lost a son back in 2019. I never had the chance to meet his son.
11) Sharon Ann Mefford; May 5th, 1953 (still living). Aunt Sharon is married to a Topmiller and they reside in Central City. She's also very interested in the family tree and our family history. I've been able to get some great photographs of the family from her over the years.
The Joneses
1) My Grandma, Mina's place in the birth order. She was the oldest. She also died first. :(
2) Joseph Edward "Pete" Jones; I'm actually uncertain of Uncle Pete's exact birth date, but it was in 1937.. and I'm not sure when he died exactly, either. It was sometime in the mid 1980's, I believe. He had been married to a woman with the last name of Cox.. sadly all of his children were adopted by their step-father with the last name of Little. I don't think any of his children had anything much to do with him. Heck, his youngest kids may never even have met him for all I know.
3) Hubert Lee "Tony" Jones; January 5th, 1940 -- July 14th, 2016. Don't you dare ever call Uncle Tony by the name "Hubert," he apparently hated it. He married two times -- his kids being by his first wife, a Wilson. His widow was maidenly a Garland. We're pretty close to a couple of his kids - especially cousin Tommy. He's right in between my Mom and Dad's age and they get on with him great. He's also very interested in his family history.
4) Dorothy Jean Jones; July 11th, 1943 -- December 3rd, 2007. She married first to a Barber and then to a Wilson. Sadly, her son, Ronnie, passed away in February of last year and it was very hard on my Dad. They grew up together and were close in age. Aunt Dorothy was the closest thing to a "Mom" that Dad had after Grandma Mina passed, or at least, he thought of her like a Mother.
5) Marilyn Jones; August 1st, 1945 -- March 12th, 2016. I had only met my Aunt Marilyn once when I was a little kid, but we reconnected on Facebook. I really really loved her. I wish I could have gotten to know her better and visit with her before she passed away. She had been married to a Boin and had a couple daughters. I'm good friends with one of the daughters -- we connected over our love of spooky stuff! She, too, is very interested in her family history.
6) Brenda Jones; October 19th, 1950 (still living). She married a Wilson and had a couple kids. They moved down to Georgia a handful of years back. She's always been very interested in our family history as well. Sadly, I've made some revelations with our DNA that not everyone in the family likes.
7) Wilma Sue "Susie" Jones; January 17th, 1954 -- July 30th, 2010. The youngest and might I say the wildest child of my Great-Grandparents Doc & Lorene. Aunt Susie married a Morgan and had a couple kids with him. In fact, her niece (my half-Aunt, Debbie) married the Morgan's brother and had kids with him. Susie & Debbie were very close in age.
The Blanford's
1) Stillborn baby girl Blanford; December 14th, 1931. I had grown up hearing about the first little baby being a girl.. and my Grandpa said she'd been buried in a shoebox, beneath a tree, in the Smith Mills Cemetery. I finally ordered off for a birth/death certificate for the baby in 2014. The stillbirth certificate says the mother, Lorene, was about six months with the child. The doctor was unsure what caused the miscarriage. It's possible it was because it was her very first pregnancy.
2) Charles Richard Blanford; May 20th, 1933 (still living). Uncle Charles is a retired college professor.. he's taught a little bit of everything. The last teaching job he had, he taught the GED program at our community college. It's safe to say that absolutely everyone knows him. EVERYONE. He's absolutely the smartest man I've ever met walking this Earth. He's never married, and never had any children... but he's been to Woodstock. How about that. He's very interested in our family history and helped me with most of my beginning information about the Blanford's and LaRue's.
3) Kenneth Eugene Blanford; November 21st, 1934 -- September 20th, 1993. Married JoAnn Williams and had a couple children, one of which, the eldest, Marcy, was very interested in her family history. Sadly, she passed away in 2018. Kenneth and JoAnn were very close to Grandpa Jady and my Grandma Glynda. Grandma thought of JoAnn as one of her blood sisters, honestly. It's through JoAnn that I'm related to my best friend who's also a genealogist, Jessica Williams.
4) This would be my Grandpa Jady's place in the birth order.
5) Jerry Lee Blanford; March 29th, 1938 -- January 12th, 2008. He married a wonderful woman named Lottie Stone and had a few kids with her; one of which died tragically in a car accident in 1969. His next wife, after their divorce, was a Coffman. I didn't meet Uncle Jerry but a couple times... I was closer to Aunt Lottie. She would come over and clean my Grandparents house on occasion so therefore I called her, when I was a kid, "Miss Lottie Clean." We're closest to their daughter, Melanie, who reminds me a lot of my Mom.
6) Delores Faye Blanford; April 28th, 1940 (still living). She married Charlie Pippin and they still live out in Geneva. She's also always been interested in the family tree.
7) Mary Virginia "Ginny" Blanford; August 6th, 1941 (still living). She's married to Larry Sigler. They haven't any children of their own -- but Aunt Ginny has been a mother or Grandmother to many. She's always been super interested in our family tree as well.
8) Martha Ann "Motts" Blanford; April 21st, 1943 -- September 9th, 2020. Aunt Motts' passing came as a complete and total shock to us. We had just buried my Granddad Glen a few weeks back.. and then suddenly Aunt Motts passed. We still really don't know from what (not COVID.) She was married to Pat Hall and had several kids with him and quite a few of them, and their children, seem interested in our family tree.
9) John William "Johnny" Blanford; October 23rd, 1944 -- May 18th, 2009. He was married a couple times and had one son. I only met Johnny maybe twice in my entire life and honestly, I don't remember either time. My Mom has told me about them, though. His first wife was a Dickerson, and his widow is a Woodward.
10) Linda Ruth Blanford; March 9th, 1947 (still living). Her kids were by her first husband, a Tinnell, and now she's married to a McCallister. She lives out of town but still came to visit my Grandparents fairly often. We're closest to her son, Bub, who is Uncle Jay's age. He and Jay were very close friends/cousins.
11) Infant Blanford; June 16th, 1950. We've never been able to find a birth or death certificate about this baby. Grandpa Jady said he believed the baby was born with the cord around its neck and unfortunately died from that. It was buried, initially, in the back of Saint Louis Cemetery but after Lorene and Dick passed away, it was stated in Dick's will, I think, that he wanted the child exhumed and moved to the front beside of their grave.
12) Joseph Earl "Jody" Blanford; August 4th, 1951 -- July 15th, 1982. Jody was mentally handicapped -- I'm not sure, but Grandpa might have told me that his handicap was due to the cord being around his neck, too, at birth. Jody wasn't supposed to live much past childhood or early adolescence, but he lived to be 30 years old. If he'd have made it another few weeks, he'd have seen 31. He died just 5 days after my Grandma Mina, the day after her funeral, actually.
13) George Edward Blanford; February 19th, 1953 (still living). He's been married twice -- his first wife, a Morris, and his second, a Pierce. His kids are by his first wife and we're closest with his daughter Marie. She's a lot like my Mama. You can't look at them and mistake them for anything but a Blanford. Uncle George is probably the most like my Grandpa Jady. He loves to joke around and push your buttons.
The Sandefur's
1) Carolyn Ann Sandefur; April 8th, 1934 -- July 30th, 1982. She was the same age as my Grandma Mina when she died..and died just a few weeks later. July 1982 saw the death of my Grandma Mina, my Uncle Jody, and my Aunt Carolyn, back to back. Her first husband was a Boatman whom died of a heart attack just two weeks after they were wed. Her next husband was a Jackson and they had three daughters. At least two of which are very interested in their family tree.
2) Donald Lloyd Sandefur; May 17th, 1936 -- August 3rd, 1994. According to my Mom, he "dropped dead of a heart attack on the tarmac at the airport," pretty much. He was married to a Burns and had two daughters, one of which has done her DNA on 23andme, so she's somewhat interested in genealogy at least. I never met Donald that I'm aware of, as I was born just a year before that.
3) William J "Buddy" Sandefur; November 5th, 1937 -- September 17th, 1994. Died six weeks after Uncle Donald.. lung cancer I believe. His widow is a Littrell and they had one son together.. and a set of twins, but sadly, the set of twins died at birth. I don't believe I properly met him either.. I was only 18 or so months when he died.
4) My Grandma's place in the birth order.
5) Phyllis Jean Sandefur; October 25th, 1946 (still living). She's been married at least three times -- her children by her first husband, a Pippin. We're closest to her son, Jimmy... but don't have anything to do with her. When I eventually write the "Grandma was kidnapped and all her money stolen" saga.. you'll understand.
6) Debra June Sandefur; June 30th, 1955 (still living). Married a Parker and had four boys. Again, because of the Grandma saga... we don't speak to her and none of her kids have anything to do with us now either. Shame how a family falls apart because they believe the abuser over the abused.
33 Great-Aunts and Great-Uncles... my fingers are killing me after typing all of this, so I think I'll wrap it up. Now you know the Mefford's, Joneses, Blanford's, and Sandefur's. I wish I had family photos of each bunch of kids, but sadly, I don't. If you check in my other blogs, you might find some goodies I've posted in the past, though.
I've been a bit delayed in posting, not just because I couldn't think of something decent enough to write about for the topic of "music," but also because we've all been dealing with the stomach bug here at my house on and off for about the last two-and-a-half weeks or so.
Anyway -- finally for the topic of "music," I thought I'd talk about some songs that remind me of people I've lost. This won't be an incredibly long blog by any means, but I hope to open y'all up to some new music that perhaps you've never heard before.
The first song -- Waitin' on a Woman by Brad Paisley. (This video features Andy Griffith.)
I can't hear this song and not think of my Grandparents. Part of the lyrics are, "somewhere I've read statistics show, the man's always the first to go. And that makes sense 'cause I know, she won't be ready. So when it finally comes my time, and I get to the other side, I'll find myself a bench, if they've got any. I hope she takes her time, because I don't mind, waitin' on a woman."
My Grandpa Jady passed away on January 11th, 2015... and my Grandma followed him on December 8th, 2015. This song came out in 2009 and I knew even then, that one day, that would be my Grandparents. My Grandpa Jady had Multiple Sclerosis, so my entire life, I prepared for him to go before my Grandma... but I never prepared for my Grandma to get sick.
What happened after my Grandma got sick, kidnapped from us, my Grandpa's death, and then her death and everything in between all that is a novel I'll write another day. But this song just always reminds me of them. Andy Griffith, too, reminds me a lot of my Grandpa Jady. If you've watched "The Andy Griffith Show," Sheriff Andy Taylor was a lot like my Grandpa Jady in so many ways.
The next song -- Whiskey Lullaby by Brad Paisley and Alison Krauss.
This song, for myself and for my Mom, reminds us of Uncle Jay. Uncle Jay battled a lot of demons... he saw a lot of stuff in the Philippines in the Air Force, and saw even more, I believe, as a Sheriff's Deputy on the Henderson County, KY, Sheriff's Department. My Uncle had always turned to alcohol (preferably rum) to hide his pain, to cope with life.
The lyrics -- "he put that bottle to his head and pulled the trigger," resonates with us. My Uncle committed what I call self-conscious suicide because he absolutely knew, without a doubt, that his drinking was going to kill him. He had come to terms with that.
The last three days of his life, he spent on a binge. If he hadn't a huge tolerance to alcohol, he'd have surely succumbed to alcohol poisoning. On the morning of the third day, he woke and poured himself a drink as he always did... but today was different. He started to vomit blood. By 10 AM, my Mom went over there and started to help him. He'd been coughing up, and occasionally, vomiting blood on and off for years. He was scared to go to a doctor because he was scared he'd contracted Hep C or HIV or AIDS. He also feared he had lung cancer from being a smoker.
That day, July 3rd, 2014, I spent with some of my best friends, celebrating one of my best friends' birthday. That night, my Mom called me and said that I needed to come home, instead of spend the night with my bestie, because my Uncle might not make it through the night. He finally agreed to go to the hospital at about 9 PM that night. I remember being up at our hospital in town and he was still lucid and coherent. We talked about me going out with friends, since we were 21 now, we'd done a little drinking. Told him I'd had a Pina Colada and he chuckled and said, "for the first time in my life, that doesn't even sound good." He looked horrible. I knew there was a chance this was the last conversation I'd ever have with him. And it was.
I came home at about midnight and by 4 o'clock in the morning, on July 4th, my Dad was waking me up and saying we needed to get to the hospital across the river, that they'd transferred my Uncle and it wasn't good. We spent our entire Fourth of July holiday in the hospital... They tried many different surgeries to stop the bleeding. At about 4 o'clock that afternoon, they said, they couldn't do anything more for him.. and that they were going to stop giving him blood, as there were other patients in that hospital that needed that blood, too. They said, it probably wouldn't be long..
At about 10 PM that night, I couldn't stand it anymore, I was so tired. I took a ride home with my then best friend and then about 7 AM in the morning, my Mom come into my room and woke me up. I knew for her to be there waking me up... it wasn't good. She said, "You've got to get up and help me. I've got to get over to Grandpa's.. Jay died a couple hours ago."
5:19 AM on July 5th, 2014. My Uncle was 49 years old. He died on my Dad's Mom's 80th birthday, or well, what would have been her 80th birthday... my Grandma Mina died of a massive heart attack on July 10th, 1982, at 48 years old.
6 months and 6 days later -- on what would have been my Uncle's 50th birthday -- January 11th, 2015, my Grandpa passed away. I don't think he had the strength in his heart to live through his son's birthday knowing that he wasn't on Earth anymore. So Grandpa slipped away in his sleep. It was his time, as they say. It's how Grandpa always wanted to go... it's how his Daddy went. Peacefully.
The next song -- Forever Young by Audra Mae and the Forest Rangers (The song was done for the show Sons of Anarchy.)
On November 18th, 2016, I lost my step-cousin/best friend to a completely unnecessary, totally preventable, and horrendous automobile accident. He was 23 years old. He had been living with us for the last year ever since my Uncle passed away. I felt like I finally had a sibling for the first time in my life. I loved him so very much. I felt like he was a brother, a cousin, a best friend, a protector, even kind of like a soulmate to a certain degree. We were kindred spirits. His death still affects me probably most of all.
Nick was somebody that should have been there to grow old with me. He should have been there when I got married, and vice versa. He should have been able to be there when I eventually have to bury my parents. I was cheated out of having him in my life until we were gray and old because the girl driving the car (who also happens to be my blood cousin) was under the influence.
The lyrics, "May your hands always be busy, may your feet always be swift. May you have a strong foundation when the winds of changes shift. May your heart always be joyful, may your song always be sung. May you stay... forever young." Those resonate the most with me.
Even though Nick had practically been abandoned by his own blood family, and even though he was hurt beyond belief of losing his almost step-Dad (my Uncle), he had felt like he found another family in us. Even through his hurt... he found reasons to be joyful - his number one reason being his son. I feel like now that he's gone... I'm about the only person that will continue to sing his song. I won't let the world forget him. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't mention his name for some reason or another. He will never ever be forgotten.
The next song -- One More Yesterday by The Relapse Symphony
This song was released on September 23rd, 2014... and it immediately started to help me get past losing Uncle Jay, or at least, dealing with my feelings. I never thought that the song would end up helping me through losing Nick, too. The guitarist, JC, wrote the song about a dear friend he'd lost in a car crash... queue two years later and I'd lose Nick to a car crash.
The lyrics, "You're not breathing, I'm not sleeping, I walk this world alone. I've been screaming, hands and knees and, now you'll never know. I don't care what tomorrow holds, I'd give the ground my broken bones, for just one more yesterday with you."
To this day... they are so profound to me. I feel that way every second of every single day. I would give absolutely everything I have right now in this moment, to get one more yesterday with Nick, or my Grandparents, or my Uncle Jay.
It was because of this song that I knew I absolutely had to see The Relapse Symphony in concert one day. Sure enough, they were announced as part of Warped Tour 2015's tour lineup. So, July 1st, 2015, I finally got to meet these guys and tell them how much their music meant to me.
I will always remember that day and cherish it. They were some of the nicest, most down to Earth guys I've ever met in my entire life... and not to forget mentioning, the most attractive, too, haha. If only I would have looked better, :P
The next song -- You Should Be Here by Cole Swindell
Another song that makes me think about Nick and Uncle Jay both. You Should Be Here by Cole Swindell was released in late 2015 but I didn't hear the song for the first time until.. I think late 2018 or early 2019. Regardless, I immediately felt the power of the song.
The lyrics, "You should be here, standing with your arm around me here. Cutting up, cracking a cold beer, saying cheers, hey y'all it's sure been a good year. It's one of those moments, that's got your name written all over it. And you know that if I had just one wish, it'd be that you didn't have to miss this... you should be here."
Even right now as I write this... I feel cheated. Jay and Nick should still be here. My Grandparents, I knew one day I'd lose them... they were in the 70's. Albeit I wish they'd have lived to see 100, I knew I'd bury them one day. But my Uncle and Nick.. Jay should have seen 70 or 80. Nick should have seen 90. My Mom shouldn't have had to bury her little brother (so to speak, he was cremated), and I shouldn't have to have buried mine, either...(also so to speak, he was cremated.)
Another song -- Brother by Falling in Reverse.
The lyrics, "I'm sorry I missed your call. I wasn't there for you at all. And know I thought it through, maybe if I'd answered you, that you would still be here, all along. Now no more calls, can't you see? I took for granted family, and once they're gone, you'll never get that back. No more laughs, no more hugs... so hold on to the ones you love."
Jay had a habit of calling us in the middle of the night and we wouldn't answer because we knew he was drunk and he'd just go on and on about this and that.. sometimes he'd get ridiculously drunk and just want to pick a fight. So we quit answering.
Nick called me a few days before he died.. I still have the missed call on my phone. He'd been wanting me to run him on some errands but found a different ride instead. Sometimes I wonder, if I'd have answered that day, would he have decided to move back in with us a few days sooner? The night he was killed... he was in the car with my cousin heading back here with all of his things. He was coming home to stay.
The last song --- Maybe It's Time by Sixx:A.M. It features the voices of Corey Taylor (Slipknot/Stone Sour), Joe Elliott (Def Leppard), Brantley Gilbert, Ivan Moody (Five Finger Death Punch), Tommy Vext (Bad Wolves), Awolnation, and even Slash from Guns n' Roses on guitars.
My Uncle struggled with more than just an alcohol addiction. On and off throughout his years, he had tried cocaine, crack, and meth. It really wasn't a secret to anybody that knew him.. he didn't try to hide it 99% of the time. This song.. it really hits a chord with me and Mom both.
The lyrics -- "Maybe it's time to heal, maybe it's time to try, maybe it's time to deal with all the pieces in my life. Maybe I'll sober up, maybe before I die, maybe I'll finally deal with all the wreckage in my life..."
I wish, I wish so much, that Jay could have found the strength to sober up before it was too late. But he was a man that was broken far beyond repair.. and he paid that morbid price.
Thanks for reading this extremely heartfelt blog today. There's a million other songs that I could include but... these really, exceptionally, mean something to me. I hope you can find some solace in them, too.
